How Joining Toastmasters Has Changed My Confidence

I used to think I was confident. Loud enough. Funny enough. I could wing it in a meeting, hold a mic on a panel, maybe even drop a few quotables here and there.

But Toastmasters? Toastmasters humbled me, in the best way.

This isn’t one of those “before and after” stories where I tell you I was terrified to speak and now I’m magically fearless. Nah. This is about a different kind of confidence. It's the kind that shows off, but the kind that shows up.

Joining Toastmasters didn’t just help me with speaking. It rewired how I think about presence, preparation, and power. It made me confront my habits, the filler words I didn’t notice, the rambling, the "umms," the safe topics I’d default to when I was unsure. And slowly, one speech, one evaluation, one timer’s bell at a time, I grew.

Confidence, I realised, isn’t about being the loudest. It’s about being the most intentional.

And this platform? It gave me that.

A Safe Space to Be Seen

One of the most underrated things about Toastmasters is that it creates a space where people actually listen. You speak, and they don’t just nod politely, they write down what you said. They watch for what you did with your hands. They catch that nervous tick you didn’t realise was a thing.

When I first joined, I thought people would just clap, smile, and move on. But what I found was far more valuable, feedback rooted in care, not ego. Constructive, specific, honest.

That level of attention made me sit up straighter. It made me want to improve. It made me realise that being listened to isn’t something we get often, and when we do, it changes everything.

Toastmasters didn’t just give me the mic, it gave me an audience that genuinely wanted me to win.

Learning to Sit With Discomfort

There’s something wildly uncomfortable about watching yourself on camera. Or hearing someone say, “You lost me around the middle.” Or realising you spent five minutes rambling without actually making a point.

But that discomfort? That’s the work.

Confidence isn’t built in ease. It’s built in the cringe moments, the awkward pauses, the honest feedback you weren’t ready for.

In the beginning, I took the evaluations personally. My inner critic would go wild: “You think I speak too fast? Do you even know how hard it is to be up there?”

But over time, I learnt to separate the feedback from my feelings. The feedback wasn’t an attack, it was a gift. A mirror.

And the more I leaned into it, the more I noticed my confidence growing. Not just in speaking, but in listening. In pausing. In owning the room, not with volume, but with presence.

From Imposter to Intentional

There was a moment, maybe a few months into my journey, when something clicked. I stopped performing and started communicating. I wasn’t trying to impress anymore. I was trying to connect.

That’s when my confidence started to feel different. Not performative. Not shaky. Just real.

I began showing up to meetings with more intention. I practised more. I listened more. I even volunteered for roles I used to avoid, like grammarian or evaluator, because I knew every part of this process was building something in me.

I didn’t need to be perfect. I just needed to be present.

And in that presence, I found power.

Winning Was Never the Goal, But It Was the Sign

When I won the District 129 International Speech Contest, representing over 200 clubs, it was surreal. Not because I had dreamed of a trophy, but because of what it represented.

That moment told me I had grown. That all the quiet practice, the journalling, the rewrites, the nerves, they added up to something real.

More than that, it made me realise I wasn’t just growing for myself. I was now in a position to help others grow too.

Because confidence? It’s contagious. And the best kind of confidence doesn’t stay with you, it spills into your teams, your community, your work.

Why This Matters Beyond the Stage

The growth I’ve experienced in Toastmasters shows up in places far beyond the club.

I speak up more in meetings now. I hold space for others to share. I write more clearly. I coach others with more empathy.

I’ve learnt that leadership and communication are deeply intertwined. You can’t lead if you can’t listen. You can’t connect if you’re not clear. And you can’t serve people if you’re constantly stuck in your own head.

Toastmasters gave me tools. But more than that, it gave me clarity.

And with clarity came confidence.

A Work in Progress

I’m still learning. I still say "um" sometimes. I still lose my train of thought. I still write scripts that I later abandon mid-speech because I realise the heart wants to say something else.

But the difference now? I trust myself.

And I think that’s the point of all this. Not to be flawless. But to be fearless enough to keep showing up, even when the voice shakes.

Because confidence isn’t about being sure. It’s about being willing.

So yeah, joining Toastmasters changed my confidence. But it didn’t give me a new voice. It helped me rediscover the one I already had.

And if you’re out there wondering if it’s for you, I’ll say this:

If you’ve got something to say, Toastmasters will help you find the courage to say it well.

And I think the world needs more of that.